Caught between the Moon & NYC

Full Moon by Robert Beck

Last night there was a full moon. I was walking with my dear friend and his dog, talking about love, women etc.--standard fare for a Monday night. I was explaining to him my latest conundrum, the most recent lady dilema, when his cell-phone buzzed. "Do you believe in the Lord?" He asked me. "Yes?" I replied, skeptical. He held up his newest text for me to view:

ADAM: I HAVE A HOT LESBIAN WHO NEEDS A DATE.

I couldn't make this up if I tried. "I will move heaven and earth to get you this lesbian," my friend said. And I laughed aloud.

The truth is this: There is really only one lady for me. There's only one who’s always there, one lady I crave. People complain that she’s high maintenance, fast, and a little bit dirty. True, she does cost me a pretty penny; and true, after a long day in her presence, I feel the need to rest up and shower off. But she is beautiful. She is winsome. She makes me feel like I can fly. She’s the smartest, funniest, most original lady in all the world—and she makes me feel the same. She makes me feel like I belong; and, since the day she became a part of my life, I have never felt out of place.

Through her I have met the most magical characters. When I was reckless and immature, she comforted me, saw to my safety. She makes me feel like I’ll never be alone. Some of my friends call her rude, harsh, and cold at times. But because I have survived the winters, stomached the brutal truth of her ways, she has ripped me open and shown me what life is. She has this magical way of creating circumstances that force me to grow. She is constantly challenging me with new people and more impossible conditions. She has put me in situations with the most intense women, and seen to it that I fell in love. Later, she tortures me with them, throws them back in my face, and teaches me the lessons over and over. She is ruthless.

Everything I know about art, about theater, about sex, is because of her. She is a constant, demanding teacher. I give her every moment of my every day. I have produced my best work because of her. I have worked insane hours because of her. I have eaten the best food in the world because she has it. I continue to stretch and grow, learn and change, all because of her. She is the one true love of my life. And she will always be. I know I will never leave her. Even if I have to go away at some point, I'm sure I will return. She is my home.

If I’m away from her too long I miss moody, brilliant women who use too many words to say what they mean. I miss the rhythm of her heart beat. I miss her shouting, horn-honking, and loud music. I miss dancing around her, singing and laughing. She is SO funny. I miss spending quiet hours, laying in Central Park, staring at her. I miss the unexpected kind moments, her softer side, her subtlety. I miss her edge, her snark, her power. When I’m away too long I miss attitude, ethnic food, and public transportation. I start to crave cement.

If you haven’t figured it out, my woman is New York.

My sweet girl, love of my life, thank you for always being there, for always puking up the right person at the right time, and then swallowing the wrong ones. Thank you for sharpening the senses, enhancing the experiences, and overall enriching the lives of those of us who dwell in you.

Forever yours,
Hopelessly devoted,
Annie Beth


PS. I’ve been pretty happy recently, and anything I can do to share that, to pass it on, I will. I’m attributing this recent high, in part, to a blurb I read last week about an 89 year old man:

“When in college, a former roommate recalls, Huston would wake up the same way every day: sit bolt upright in bed, stretch out his arms and yell ‘Yes!’”

I have adopted a similar routine—let’s talk about an awesome way to start each day. I’m advising all who read this to give it a shot, at least once, I promise it will rock your morning. If it doesn’t, the next blog is on me.

And if you get caught between the moon and New York City (I know it's crazy, but it's true); if you get caught between the moon and New York City, the best that you can do is fall in love.